5 ways that pet sitters can respond to the death of a client’s pet
On the second Sunday of June each year, pet owners observe World Pet Memorial Day—a time to remember the pets who added so much to their lives, but are no longer with them.
Losing a pet isn’t easy, because pets are family. And as a pet sitter, the death of a client’s pet presents a unique challenge. Not only do you have to cope with the loss of a pet who became a special part of your life, but you also must face how to respond to the grieving pet owner. Some clients may even turn to you for advice regarding when it is time to let a pet go.
Experiencing the loss of a beloved animal—whether it’s your own pet or a client’s pet—is never easy, but it is something you will likely face many times over the course of your pet-sitting career. Understanding the ways that you can respond to the death of a client’s pet will help you provide the best possible service, and perhaps provide a measure of comfort to you as well.
Here are five ways that you can respond to the death of a client’s pet:
1. Understand the grieving process. It is important for you to know the common stages and emotional responses to grief. Each person grieves differently, but some common responses may include shock/denial, searching/yearning, guilt (especially if the pet was euthanized or died of an unexpected illness), anger and reorganization/acceptance. Pet parents may even experience disenfranchised grief and feel like they have to hide their grief, since society does not always recognize the grief someone experiences for a pet as valid. PSI’s e-book “What Every Professional Pet Sitter Should Know about Pet Loss & Grief Counseling” guides readers through the common stages and emotional responses to grief and answers questions about how to help a grieving pet owner, and help you grieve yourself.
2. Be there for the client. As a professional pet sitter, be willing to listen to an owner in his or her time of grief without trying to “fix it.” The loss is real, as you well know, so acknowledge it and respond with patience and without judgment. Just be there for the pet owner, even if you don’t know what to say, and give the pet parent time and space to grieve in his or her own way, which may be different from the way that you experience and process grief.
3. Consider other pets in the family. If a client has more than one pet, other pets may go through their own periods of grief when one of their siblings dies. As you are pet sitting or dog walking these pets, monitor them closely, and make sure you and the pet owners maintain a consistent daily routine for them. Dr. Karen Becker offers some advice in the post “10 Tips for Helping Your Surviving Pet Deal with a Loss.”
4. Embrace the memories. Memories live on after a pet has died. Encourage the pet owners to talk about their pets and remember the full range of experiences they shared with them—not just the recent sad times, but all of the good times as well. Trying to bury the emotions and memories will just prolong the grieving process.
5. Show that you remember and care. There are many ways that you can honor the life of a pet. For example, you could donate time or money in memory of the deceased pet, offer to help plan or participate in a memorial service or activity, create a memorial collage or scrapbook, send a sympathy card or give the pet owner a book on the topic of pet loss.
Bonus tip: As a professional pet sitter, make sure you acknowledge the grief you feel over a client’s pet as a real and important thing to address. Regularly practice self-care, and learn how to identify and address compassion fatigue. Professional pet sitters are caregivers, so they can fall prey to compassion fatigue. As Katherine Dobbs, LVT, CVPM, PHR, explained in a webinar to PSI members, burnout is typically associated with where you work and can be improved by leaving that specific job, but compassion fatigue is more associated with the work you do. To learn more, read this post on The PSI Blog: Pet sitter burnout and compassion fatigue: What you should know.
Pet sitters, what are some methods that you have found helpful in coping with pet loss and comforting grieving pet parents?
Comments
Britan
Linda Baumert
Midge Mooney
Nicknames and include that and a sentiment for that particular baby. It helps me and my client
Amy
Blood glucose monitoring system
Linda Day
Shelley
Rachel Garrido
Gail